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For those of you not acquainted, Bob Lonsberry is a local (Rochester, NY) radio personality who writes for his website and also does 'bits' for local television. As is expected, Mr Lonsberry 'hits a home-run" with this column! I thought I'd share a partial column with those who may not know of him:
WHAT IS THAT OVER YOUR EYES?
Eyebrows are one more proof that God is a man.
Just like stand-up urination.
It is clear that, if God was a woman, eyebrows would be lower maintenance.
As it is, in a patriarchal universe, women are doomed to pluck, prune, wax, shave, tattoo and draw themselves silly in order to have decent eyebrows.
At least that’s what women think.
Because men couldn’t care less. There is not a single man in the history of the world who has even noticed that women have eyebrows. The exception would be gay men who notice, but just because they’re looking for grooming tips.
In the competitive world of “I think you’re hot,” eyebrows have never been a deciding factor. It’s never even been a tiebreaker.
There are leg men, and boob men, and butt men, but there are not eyebrow men. Remember that.
And yet, women stare into mirrors, tweezers in their hands, searching out and exterminating errant hairs.
This is one more difference between men and women, on top of the men-have-bigger-brains thing. See, men don’t pull hair out of their bodies. That’s because they have bigger brains. Men learned long ago that, ouch, that hurts.
So if it grows there, it stays there.
If it was supposed to go away, Gillett would have invented something to shave it.
Which gets back to women.
Some women shave their eyebrows. Either that or after years of plucking, the eyebrows have just given up. Maybe you can only pull something out by the roots a certain number of times before it just gives up and dies.
At any rate, there are women with no hair on their eyebrows.
They scare me.
I know it’s supposed to be some sort of Brazilian thing, but, honestly, it doesn’t look right.
Which is why they pencil them in.
This is particularly true of old women who personally remember the 1950s. Somewhere, probably at an adult novelty shop, they get pencils in shades of [....]<-<-to me, that means ya gotta to to his site to read the rest!!
http://www.lonsberry.com/bio.cfm
http://www.wham1180.com/main.html
Til Nex'Time....If you enjoyed this column in it's entirety, Mr Lonsberry has "a ton of 'em" archived on his site for your continued enjoyment!! Bob's radio broadcast is five-days-a-week; WHAM, 1180AM; 11AM-2PM, eastern; and on the web for those anywhere on this planet as well as others!!http://www.lonsberry.com/writings.cfm?go=4
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